im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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