I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
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