Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
