Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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