Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
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