your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
