I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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