I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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