whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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