STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I'm just crazy horny about you
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Randomize
