Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
pray to the hookup gods
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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