Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize