hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
