And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
We don't watch enough power rangers
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Let's get the cat blown out
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
