The brown eye won't let me do that either.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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