Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
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