Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize
