i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
She needs sedatives and a leash
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
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