i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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