i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
My vagina just recognized that song.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
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