I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
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