woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
