I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
