it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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