I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Blood and glitter go together right?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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