hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I'm like, not good at living.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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