put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
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