I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
there is puke in my bra ... again
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
