I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
