There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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