I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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