Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
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