she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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