i already hear my dad disowning me
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Randomize
