I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
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