we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Girls should come with a carfax report
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?