If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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