She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
