his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
home. puking in laundry basket.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
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