so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Randomize
