she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
