It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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