I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
