his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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