Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
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He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
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Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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