i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize