Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
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