Farmville is her only friend.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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