I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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