We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
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He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
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Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
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