Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
