If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
