So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
